1. The “OMG Girls”- Every party has them. They’re the girls who walk into a party and the second they see someone they’ve talked to once they act like the world is ending. You would think by the way they’re jumping and screaming they’re long lost friends, but in reality they just started following each other on Twitter yesterday.
2. The Wallflower- This guy or girl usually doesn’t have much to say. They just stand there drinking their beer in complete silence and very awkwardly. The best way to deal with these people is to attempt to start a conversation… if all else fails just pretend you have to use the bathroom and get the hell out of there.
3. The Stage Ten Clinger- We’ve all been there, that guy or girl who won’t seem to leave your side. Whether it’s a boy who is infatuated by you, or a girl who wants to be your best friend, you can’t escape them. At first it was fun having someone who was obsessed with your every movement, but now it’s like an overplayed song. As much as you want to cut ties and ditch this person completely, you can’t. The only way to deal with these people is the pawn them off on someone off else and pray for the best.
4. The “Do you want to see my room” Boy- Avoid him at all costs, chances are you won’t be looking at his room. I’m sure his room is nice, but don’t be naïve. If you do decide to go, do yourself a favor and bring a friend with you. The last thing you need is a bad case of the last night regrets. If you’re really lucky the only thing this guy will be offering is alcohol.
5. The Couch Potato- This is classic occurrence at any party. It’s the guy who’s passed out on the couch because he decided to go extra hard that night during the pregame. Unfortunately for him, he’s going to wake up with vulgar drawings on his face… in permanent maker. Hopefully he doesn’t have class the next day. Don’t be that guy.
6. The Extreme Photographer- This girl is the one who whips out her gold IPhone 5s right when she walks into the party and starts asking the famous line no guy can bear to hear. “Take a picture of me and (insert name here).” Chances are she will wake up with 100+ pictures on her camera roll and not an ounce of memory as to how they got there/who they’re even with. Another famous line will come out of her mouth, “I don’t even remember taking this!!!”
7. The “I’m not that drunk” Girl- Every girl has experienced this at some point or another. You take one too many shots and suddenly it’s all downhill after that. Stumbling and falling as you walk through the party claiming, “I’m not that drunk” when your actions clearly say otherwise. One minute you’re talking about that Professor you hate and the next, “Timber” starts playing and you’re dancing on a table.
8. The Social Butterfly- We all know one and they know everyone. From the second they walk into the party people flock to this guy or girl. The perks of being friends with this person are, you’ll always have an invite to every party on campus. The perks of being the, “Social Butterfly” are you will never find yourself awkwardly standing the in middle of a party looking for someone to spark a conversation with. Props to you.
9. The BP Champ- This guy’s team has gone 20-0 the whole night and the only consistent thing about it is that he’s in charge. The best way to identify him is to hangout by the beer pong table or check twitter the next day. Chances are if he’s that good, he’ll brag about it. If you’re lucky you might even come across a picture he posted on Instagram captioned, “BP Champs.”
10. The Typical White Girl– She’s back for the semester and she’s here to stay. People know her as the girl who tweets about how drunk she is or by her text messages that make no sense whatsoever. The first words out of her mouth when she’s drunk are, “I just want to dance.” You’ll find her dancing in her dorm room during the pregame to Sammy Adams’ “All Night Longer” or crying in the hall because someone spilled their drink on her favorite Michael Kors purse.
I’m just a sophomore at St. John Fisher College who loves writing and chocolate chip cookies.
View all articles by Ashley Grates
